I know you mean well but

please stop telling me (with barely concealed malicious delight) all of the following

  • You’re life is going to change so much!
  • Get all the sleep you can now!
  • Well those days are over!

I know, all right?  Maybe I don’t physically know yet, but I am a reasonably intelligent woman, before deciding to get pregnant I realised that I would have to give up things like regular sleep, copious amounts of booze and fancy dinners out.  I still chose to do this. 

So stop with the dire warnings, already, I’m not an idiot.  I’m sure things will be harder than I ever imagined when I’m in the middle of raising a newborn, but I’m also sure there will be plenty of positives to help make up for it.  So give the gleeful warnings a rest, please, they just make you look like a jerk.


Also, if you are on the bus and there are no seats and you see a pregnant woman staring balefully at her lack of options, stand the hell up and stop being a selfish buttface.  Same goes for old people and the disabled.  You can still read your stupid free newspaper in a standing position you giant douchebag.



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6 responses to “I know you mean well but

  1. I hated those comments, too. Why doesn’t anyone ever say how funny it can be? How great it is to feel love like that? What an adventure it will be for you guys?

    Instead they have to make you feel like you are a) stupid b) a baby yourself

    P.S. Just to practice what I preach: Kids and babies = funny. And the love! And the crazy adventure! It’s very very good…

    • carolynintheuk

      Oh this was absolutely not directed at you, Anthony. You guys have made all of one comment about what we should do before the baby arrives ad about 5 million comments about how much you love being parents and how awesome and funny Sarah is. I’m aiming this at the lame-ohs who only give the dire warnings and none of the awesome stories

  2. Having kids = the best thing ever. But you have to keep quiet about it or everybody will want one.

    • carolynintheuk

      I will keep this in mind, also since I can’t comment on your blog from work I must say this here, if you are in Peckham you let me know! I’m just at the other end of Peckham Rye Common in Nunhead. I could have taken you to the nice new deli in Nunhead or to so other nice place nearby. Please consider yourself told.

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