I know you mean well but

please stop telling me (with barely concealed malicious delight) all of the following

• You’re life is going to change so much!
• Get all the sleep you can now!
• Well those days are over!

I know, all right?  Maybe I don’t physically know yet, but I am a reasonably intelligent woman, before deciding to get pregnant I realised that I would have to give up things like regular sleep, copious amounts of booze and fancy dinners out.  I still chose to do this. 

So stop with the dire warnings, already, I’m not an idiot.  I’m sure things will be harder than I ever imagined when I’m in the middle of raising a newborn, but I’m also sure there will be plenty of positives to help make up for it.  So give the gleeful warnings a rest, please, they just make you look like a jerk.

 

Also, if you are on the bus and there are no seats and you see a pregnant woman staring balefully at her lack of options, stand the hell up and stop being a selfish buttface.  Same goes for old people and the disabled.  You can still read your stupid free newspaper in a standing position you giant douchebag.

More things I say in other places

My friend Sarah let me have another go at being a guest on her awesome blog Cry Cry Baby

You can read it here.

Sad day

So I was just browsning through Transpontine and found this news:

http://transpont.blogspot.com/2012/03/last-orders-at-montague-arms.html

Obviously I haven’t been much of a pub goer recently so I had no idea about any of it. 

I know it’s probably a little silly to be sad about the loss of a pub, but The Montague Arms was one of my favourite places in London.  I can’t believe I never get to go back there, it will be much missed.

One night my friend David got a bit silly on pints there and decided to count all the taxidermied zebras.  I believe he found 24.